Do The Job Properly Will You?
This article is about eggs. Thus, if you find the idea of chicken-spawn repulsive, nightmarish, or altogether distasteful, then leave at once, before it’s too late!
There, now we can begin. And I shall do so like this:
Contrary to popular belief, there really is only one way to cook a fried-egg, just as there is only one way to do leg vein treatment without making a right pig’s ear of it. It’s a good job you stumbled across this post dear reader. Prepare to have your mind duly BLOWN!
Now, some amateurs believe, mistakenly, that you can cook an egg yoke properly simply by tossing hot oil over it with your utensil. And they aren’t even the biggest offenders. No–The biggest offenders are those who turn their egg OVER to cook the yoke. Back in the middle-ages that kind of nonsensical behaviour would have got you hung-drawn, quartered, and possibly while simultaneously having rotten eggs thrown at you!
So as every person who can truly cook an egg knows, there really is only one way, and it goes like this: you drop the egg in to the hot oil like usual, and, when the underneath is starting to go golden-brown, you take your spoon and you ladle, yes, LADEL, the hot oil very carefully on to the yoke. And voila, in half the time that it takes with a poxy spatula you have yourself a perfectly cooked egg!
That’s the right way to do it. Don’t let anyone tell you any different!